in defense of traditional values

There was a blog post shared on Facebook recently titled "I look down on young women with husbands and kids and I'm not sorry". The post got a lot of flack from stay at home moms and moms everywhere, understandably. Jeremy thought I was fuming because, according to her, I have "no real accomplishments", "don't take care of myself", and I don't "work". All these things could be and are insulting. Like all a mother or stay at home mom does is park her bulk around the house and do nothing while her children raise themselves and her house cleans itself and her marriage maintains itself and meals make themselves... But the real problem here is her disdain of traditional values - marriage, children, and training them. I probably shouldn't be surprised, but I don't know how she can think maintaining a marriage over x years and rearing children that are Godly, kind, servant hearted, and hard working is not an accomplishment and doesn't take work. Where does she think that engineers, doctors (clearly the only careers that are worth something...), etc come from if they aren't raised and trained and loved by their parents?
I actually did bother to read her whole post (very short) in which she claims that marriage and having children are so ordinary as to be average. (She is neither married nor a mother.) She is right - they are ordinary things and yet so beautiful and amazing and truly miracles from God. I could look at finding a partner for life as boring - and yet, I wouldn't have gotten married if God hadn't put Jeremy & I together. I could look at children as an unplanned burden. And yet, seeing that children don't just "happen" to everyone, they feel like a precious miracle to me. They were born and born healthy through no work of my own.
She also says that laundry will never be as important as a being a doctor or engineer or building a business. True. If I found my value of being a SAHM by my ability to do laundry, I would be thoroughly depressed. But laundry = taking care of my family. Taking care of my family = love. Therefore, although laundry is boring and tedious, it's just part of my service to my family. And what does she know - I could be raising a doctor, engineer, a business owner, a child who grows up to have a life of service to others.
She might think backpacking through Asia, landing a dream job, or a golden promotion are worth far more than what I do every day. I say, big deal. I've worked outside the home. I had jobs I endured and jobs I liked and I can tell you what I'm doing now feels like the first thing I've done that's really "worth" something. I'm doing the Lord's work here.
Chin up, ladies! What we do has an eternal contribution to the world unlike anything this woman will ever do at her job.

clouds in my coffee

 I had a conversation with a couple friends with young children one time. We were probably surrounded by shrieking children who were fighting/getting into the toilet/eating chapstick or crayons or whatever they could find and bite. One of them said, "Do you ever dream of sitting down in peace and just eating a sandwich?" I understood completely what she meant. Quiet, blissful silence.
I, however, don't really care that much about eating sandwiches, and more important, my kids don't. They would be highly unlikely to bother me while I was eating.
My dream is to sit down in the morning with a cup of coffee and just enjoy it. No little girl begging me for a sip (yes, she will drink it black or with creamer, just not piping hot). No little hands tugging on the arm that is bringing the cup up for a sip to spill all over one's self or the couch or the floor.
There's a coffee stain on my living room carpet now. Jeremy couldn't believe I was dumb enough to drink it in there. Was it really too much to ask to drink on my own comfy loveseat? I guess.

I have to remind myself that there will be plenty of time for quiet coffee drinks in the future. A day coming when my kids will probably think they'll get an infectious disease from drinking out of the same cup as me. They won't want to sit on my lap or beside me on the couch, begging for my attention or one more book to read.
I want them to grow up. Seeing them gain independence and strong personalities is one of the things that brings me true delight.
But I was looking at some old pictures the other day, and while I wouldn't want to go back, I already miss the little people that they were once.

They are growing up ridiculously fast. Again, a good and sad thing at the same time.
I just want to know that I enjoyed the time I had while it was mine.
Days with you, my sweet little kids, are so bittersweet.

the ballad of two

Two kids is awesome. Sometimes annoying or frustrating but mostly pretty cool, as I see them get to be good friends and watch them share and look out for each other, at least some of the time.
This isn't even a fraction of the amount of pictures I've taken of the two of them together, more so as they've gotten older and started playing together.

But as they say, all good things must come to an end. The days of the ballad of two are numbered.
Two kids is awesome. But I'm sure three will be better. :)

I know some people are weirded out by sonograms but in spite of all the evidence, I don't really "feel" pregnant until I know my baby is alive and healthy. It's just nice to know.

Some of you have asked if the kids are excited. Madeira is clueless. I told River I was having another baby, and he looked at me with a small amount of irritation and asked, "Why?" in a withering tone. So no, neither of them seem to care, at least at this point.
Jeremy asked me last night what we were going to do with 3 kids. It seems so far away that I can't really be worried about it yet. I have no idea. We had no idea with 1 or 2 kids, and we limp along. I'm sure 3 will be the same.
If you are curious, I'm not sure if we'll find out what we're having or not. Jeremy informed me a while back that if we ever did find out the gender, we weren't going to be telling anyone. I don't know if I'll be able to keep a secret...
Anyway, I'm excited about a May baby. My dad is the only one in the family with a May birthday and I was kind of hoping that I'd have a baby on his birthday at some point for some reason. But just having a baby in May will be good enough. Why push my luck, right?
On a final note: Everytime I'm pregnant, I have the thought that this time I will be both cute and comfortable. Cough. So again, wish me luck.

what i wanted

Some of you probably don't agree with me, but I give a lot of thought to what I name my children.
Years ago, when I came up with the name for my someday daughter, I imagined that she would be strong, tough, confident, sassy, sweet, charming, and the cutest little girl I could ever imagine.
I'm amazed. Today I have a little girl who fits the name I gave her like a glove.
Those gorgeous grey eyes, that sweet little grin, her fun personality, the way she says please and thank you, her shared habit of getting two of something so she can give one to her brother all have me wrapped around her little finger.
Lady M, you are my sunshine.

oregon

Oregon. Who ever would have thought I'd have a reason to travel there like once a year? I dragged my feet the first time I went there in 2000, mostly because everyone acted like it was the most amazing place on the planet. They grow berries! (Big deal! Ohio produced delicious berries too.)
I've matured some since then (right:)) and now what I like about Oregon are the berries  and hazelnuts that I will be receiving from my farmer brother-in-law's fields and my little sister's company.
So this will not be the last trip I make to the Left Coast.

Waiting for the shuttle that never came at our parking lot. :) It was a shortish walk to the airport although we were somewhat hampered by the luggage and keeping track of the offspring.

Waiting to board the plane at Midway. Exciting times for the kids.

We stayed in Portland overnight when we flew in and went to the zoo the next day. It's a pretty awesome place - the animals were a little sleepy but it wasn't that hot, thank goodness. Kids had a great time.

Jen met us at the zoo and then we went back to their place.

The kitchen in our place at Jen's. Pretty nice digs!

Hazelnut harvest was coming on in the Willamette Valley - I didn't actually get to watch the harvest but some hazelnuts made their way to Illinois eventually.

Concord grapes - they reminded me of Ohio. Picking and eating grapes is one of my favorite childhood memories.

Riley giving Riv a ride in his homemade cart.

Madeira enjoying a ride with Buck in the cart.

We hit up a little grocery store in Silverton - it reminded me of Fresh Market. Which is cool. :)

Grilling burgers one night for supper.

Riv enjoying one of Jen's cinnamon rolls. Poor kid smiles just like his mother...

We went to an abbey in Mt. Angel one morning.

After we were done walking around the abbey, we went into Mt. Angel for the Oktoberfest. This is a big deal, people. Bands come in from Germany, people were dressed like the Sound of Music, it was crazy.

Madeira eating a corn sausage.

We went to this creek in Silverton after the kids woke up from their naps. It was kind of cold.

Uncle Darwin taking River fishing at the pond behind Marian's house. No fish were caught but we still had fun.

We headed up to Newport on Friday with Jen, stopping on the way at the beach in Lincoln City.

I love this picture. Guess which child flew to the water and which one was a little less thrilled?

The seals in Newport's harbor.

Salt water taffy making machine.

Crabbing one morning. Apparently it was not a good crabbing year but we had some fun and ended up being able to take 8 or so home.

We went to another beach, Depoe Bay, on the way home from Newport.

Our gracious hosts. :)

We look...old. :(

Crab boil with what we caught.

Even across the country, I can't get away from making my signature snack.

Trying to take some pictures of my lady like little girl.

Marie's backyard - just beautiful!

Jen, Mad, & I went shopping one day and found a papersource. Just like a half hour from her house. How great is that?

Anthropologie. :)

Lunch at PF Chang's. Mad was taking her coloring very seriously.

A World Market shopping experience.

We stopped by EZ Orchards - cute little place.

 

We had to stop by Willamette Fruit Company or something like that for pie and ice cream. I think Darwin takes some of his berries there. Could be wrong about that though.

We checked out one of Darwin's fields Tues before we flew home.

Portland's airport

They even had a little set up for kids at the airport.

Until next time!